Chinwe was chatting happily as we walked through the big market in town, I had a lot going through my mind and if I don't start talking now, it will take less than a minute before her psychological mind begins with the blunt questions. "Oh! Look at this, Mary! Mary!! Mary!!!" I jerked out of my thoughts and found Chinwe looking at me, why is she looking at me strangely "yes? What?"

I am not daft to had noticed something is wrong with my childhood friend, I thought she was having one of those moments she doesn't feel like talking so I had spend minutes cracking jokes that she wasn't laughing to, not until I turned to my right and saw I was alone and she was two steps behind staring at the beautiful wedding dresses on display, well, the gowns are beautiful but I wondered why she was staring hard as if she was about to broke in and steal the dress, so I had to shout her name thrice and she jerked her head up "yes? What?". "Mary what's wrong with you? You have been awfully quiet, are you having issues with Mike?" (Mike is her boyfriend, they have been dating for 4 years). "Chinwe I want to propose". "You mean business proposal or what?" "Stop it Chinwe, I mean I want to go down on a kneel, bring out a shining ring and ask him to marry me. Yeah I know Mike and I have been dating for 4 years, we are both financially okay, he loves me and I love him too". I just hoped Chinwe would understand me. " Chinwe can you hear me?".

I laughed hysterically, forgive me, but I am known for my notorious laughter but looking at Mary, I knew she was in no mood for my play, I schooled my expression and replied "I understand your plight but I really do not want you to be a national disgrace, there are so many viral videos of rejected proposals, can you deal with it if it doesn't work in your favor?" I recently conducted a mini-research, 95% of the ladies thinks it is stupid and weird, 5% thinks well it's no biggie. Clara said, "This is Africa, the guy will see you as a desperate lady if he's ready to propose he will". The guys couldn't stop commenting on the subject "should a lady propose?". 
Philip said
 "it's my responsibility, my tradition does not allow a lady to propose to a man and scripturally not wise, na man dey carry woman no be the other way"
 John said
"I might appreciate it if I was proposed to, ladies are rejected because of the norms we believe in"
Dapo said 
"it's not nice, there won't be respect and value for the lady".Bolu said "I don't see it as a big deal but someone else no matter the great love he has for the lady will still reject her, you have got to understand your partners taste and it comes by observing and knowing not assuming"
 Tomi said 
"it is morally and scripturally wrong, if you've been in a relationship for a long time and the man is yet to propose, the lady can ask the guy his plans on marriage, they can discuss it between them and from the guy response, she will know what to do".

There are so many comments but even some that said it's no biggie don't want their girl to propose. Mary, from the responses ask yourself these questions, will Mike wants you to propose or talk to him about it? Is he someone who values culture and tradition and will not blink an eye before rejecting your proposal? I want you to sit and ask yourself again "should I propose?" Weigh your options and conditions.

Hmm, Chinwe has spoken well, will Mike appreciate it? I will just have to sit and think about it again. "Smile for me jor and let's shop till we drop dead," she said, I laughed to that, believe me, you won't like to shop with Chinwe, she's a shopping freak.